How do 2-year-olds develop a sense of autonomy and control over their emotions and behaviors?
If you’re a parent or caregiver of a 2-year-old, you may have noticed them asserting their autonomy and control in various ways, such as saying ‘no’ to everything or throwing a tantrum when they don’t get what they want. This is a typical and vital stage in their development, as they are starting to discover their own sense of self and independence. In this article, we’ll explore how 2-year-olds develop a sense of autonomy and control over their emotions and behaviors, and what you can do to support them.
What is autonomy?
Autonomy is the ability to make decisions and take actions independently, without being controlled by others. In the context of child development, autonomy is crucial because it helps children learn and grow. It can lead to increased self-esteem and confidence, which are essential for children to develop healthy relationships and succeed in life.
How do 2-year-olds develop autonomy?
Between the ages of 18 months and 3 years, children start to develop their sense of autonomy. They are learning that they can make their own choices and have an impact on the world around them. This stage is commonly referred to as the ‘terrible twos’, as children begin to test limits and assert their independence.
One of the ways that 2-year-olds develop autonomy is by exploring their environment. They may want to touch and taste everything, climb on furniture, or run around without supervision. This exploration helps them learn about cause and effect, and the consequences of their actions.
Another way that 2-year-olds develop autonomy is through play. Play allows children to use their imagination and creativity, and to make choices about what they want to do. For example, they may choose to play with a particular toy or engage in a specific activity. This ability to make choices is an important aspect of developing autonomy.
2-year-olds also develop autonomy through their relationships with others. They may want to do things on their own, without help from a caregiver or parent. For example, they may want to put on their own shoes or feed themselves. This desire for independence is a natural part of their development, and it’s important that caregivers support it.
How do 2-year-olds develop control over their emotions?
As children develop autonomy, they also need to learn how to control their emotions. This can be a challenging task, as 2-year-olds often experience intense emotions such as anger, frustration, and fear.
One of the ways that 2-year-olds develop control over their emotions is through their relationships with caregivers. When a caregiver responds to a child’s emotional needs, it helps the child learn that their emotions are valid and can be expressed in a healthy way. Caregivers can help children learn to regulate their emotions by acknowledging their feelings and providing comfort.
Another way that 2-year-olds develop control over their emotions is through play. Play allows children to express their emotions in a safe and creative way. For example, they may use dolls or stuffed animals to act out a situation that’s causing them anxiety. This type of play helps children learn to manage their emotions and cope with stressful situations.
What can you do to support your 2-year-old’s development of autonomy and emotional control?
As a parent or caregiver, there are many ways you can support your 2-year-old’s development of autonomy and emotional control. Here are some tips:
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- Provide opportunities for exploration and play. Let your child explore their environment in a safe and supervised way, and provide plenty of toys and activities to encourage imagination and creativity.
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- Set clear boundaries and expectations. Your child needs to know what is and isn’t allowed, but it’s important to give them choices within those boundaries. For example, you may tell your child that they can’t climb on the furniture, but they can choose which toy to play with.
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- Be patient and understanding. Tantrums and emotional outbursts are a normal part of 2-year-old behavior. Try to remain calm, acknowledge your child’s feelings, and provide comfort and support.
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- Provide opportunities for independence. Encourage your child to do things on their own, such as putting on their shoes or feeding themselves. This will help them develop confidence and autonomy.
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- Model healthy emotional regulation. Your child learns from your behavior, so it’s important to model healthy emotional regulation. Try to stay calm during difficult situations, express your emotions in a healthy way, and provide comfort and support to your child when they need it.
The development of autonomy and emotional regulation is a crucial stage in every child’s life. As a parent or caregiver, it’s important to support your 2-year-old’s development by providing opportunities for exploration and play, setting clear boundaries and expectations, being patient and understanding, providing opportunities for independence, and modeling healthy emotional regulation. With your support, your child will develop the skills they need to become confident, independent, and emotionally stable adults.
You also could see another post where we talk about WHAT ARE SOME EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES FOR ADDRESSING SEPARATION ANXIETY IN 2-YEAR-OLDS? .

Statistical Data
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• By age 2, most children are able to express a wide range of emotions, including joy, anger, sadness, and fear.
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• They can also begin to recognize their own feelings and those of others.
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• At this age, children are beginning to understand the concept of cause and effect and can begin to take responsibility for their actions.
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• They may also start to show signs of independence by asserting their own preferences in terms of clothing or activities.
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• By age 2, most children can follow simple instructions and understand basic rules such as not hitting or biting.
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• They may also be able to delay gratification by waiting for something they want.
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• Most 2yearolds can also identify their own needs and wants and communicate them effectively.

Numerical Data
Scope | Description |
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Uses | • By age two, most children have developed a sense of autonomy and control over their emotions and behaviors. |
Uses | • They are able to express their wants and needs, and are beginning to understand the consequences of their actions. |
Uses | • They can follow simple instructions, take turns in games, and understand basic rules. |
Users | • They can also express a range of emotions, including joy, sadness, anger, fear, and surprise. |
In detail | • Twoyearolds are also beginning to develop empathy for others and can recognize when someone is feeling sad or angry. |
Users | • They are able to take responsibility for their own actions by saying “sorry” when they make a mistake or hurt someone’s feelings. |
Uses | • Twoyearolds are also starting to learn how to regulate their own behavior by using selfcontrol techniques such as counting to ten or taking deep breaths when they become frustrated or angry. |